You’re tired of your narcissistic parent’s intrusions into your life. She calls you at work, stalks you on the internet, and constantly intrudes in your personal life. You even suspect that she is going through your mailbox before you get home.
You are not alone. A universal characteristic of narcissists is that they have virtually no regard for personal boundaries. They violate boundaries at will with no thought of how the other person feels. A trait that leaves children of narcissists frustrated. Continue reading
Back in sixth grade, my class put on a play. After the play, my girlfriend and I snuck off to an empty classroom.
We were quite excited as we never had the chance to be alone during school. In my excitement I forgot about my narcissistic mother.
But I quickly remembered her when she burst through the class room door. Anger roiled off her like a demon who broke his bonds.
In her anger, she didn’t care about maintaining appearances in front of my girlfriend. She started raging right in front of her. She yelled, “How dare you leave me in the auditorium alone? I was waiting and waiting for your thoughtless ass.” Of course she threw in question of how could I do this after everything she does for me.
She told me she put aside some money to take me out after the play. “There’s no way we’re doing that now,” she said. “I only take out my children that love me. And you’re clearly not one of them.” Continue reading
Your narcissistic parent doesn’t like it when you have an impressive accomplishment. He feels that you are showing him up.
But he uses your accomplishment for his own glorification. He finds a way to take credit for what you did. Or if he doesn’t take credit directly, he lets your accomplishment shine on him as you are his son or daughter.
When you were a child, if your parent supported you in activities where you could produce accomplishments or victories, it wasn’t because he wanted to support your personal growth.
No. Your parent did it for what he got out of it. He basked in your accomplishment as if he had achieved what you did. Your victory gave him a chance to take credit for the skills you developed, even though they were not his. Continue reading
It’s not uncommon for everyone you know to think your narcissistic parent is the greatest thing since spray cheese. Meanwhile, you’re amazed. Can’t everyone see he’s an ass?
No, they can’t. Remember, a narcissist presents a false image of himself to the world. To everyone outside the family he’s kind, caring, generous, lovable, and he might even be one to lend an ear and listen to another’s problems. He’s not the same angry, miserly, unlovable lout that you know.
The differences between the two sides of your parents makes you think you’re insane. Continue reading